This is my tenth year teaching.
I need to let that sink in a little bit. It overwhelms me. No, seriously. I said it out loud today and I didn’t believe myself. So I counted on my fingers to make sure.
I’m sure. (Big gulp)
People who have taught longer than me will tell me that time flies, the years go faster, yadda yadda. I know, ok? I know. It’s like telling a pregnant lady that if she thinks she is tired now, just wait until the baby comes.
Some things are better left unsaid.
In my role as a division head, I only teach one class. I spent the past two years working in our program for very academically at-risk students. This year, I get to teach a class of Spanish again. And so, on top of my minor freak-out about this being my TENTH year, I am also freaking out that holy cow, I have to remember how to teach Spanish. I feel ready, but… I don’t know, nervous!
The first day of school is my absolute favorite. I love the rush of the new kiddos, finding lockers, lost little freshmen, sharpening pencils, new outfits, old friends… It makes my heart swell every. time. A year fresh and full of possibilities – it is the best. And those nerves…. a thousand little butterflies ready to soar.
This year, I have been reflecting on where I will focus my energy, about how I will continue to develop in my roles in the building, but also in life in general. It’s so funny, it’s like this new house has brought a sense of settling to life – things are still chaotic and ever-changing, but it feels stable, like I can breathe and think and do.
Part of my nerves, and oddly, part of my settling, is a song lyric that has been stuck in my brain for about two weeks now. I think about it over and over, and then I pray about it, and wrestle with what it might mean. I can’t get it out. And with my tenth year gearing up to go, it just repeats and repeats…
“Every time somebody lives to serve and not be served…”
The message is clear as a bell. There is no denying that. How that serving looks in my world gives me much to consider, and certainly reflection on those times when I am living to be served merit reflection as well. I can easily point to the others around me who I feel are demanding to be served, but this isn’t about them – it’s about me, and about a lyric that, in this tenth year, when life would seem to be settled, somehow is my driving force for change.
Live to serve and not be served.
This is a developing story. More from the field as it becomes available.
To listen to the full song from which this lyric comes, see below: